We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

The Journey to Wholeness (2017​-​2023)

by Larry Lin

supported by
/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.
    Purchasable with gift card

      name your price

     

1.
Still 04:51
I’ve turned a blind eye for far too long But I can’t deny that I can’t go on I got a stone in my chest and blood on my hands I can’t find no rest in the Promised Land A thousand times I have let you down A thousand times I have sold you out A thousand times I have broken my vows But still you love me Still you call me Still you won’t let go My sins and their chains, they weigh me down Surrounding my name, calling me out I wish I could say “none of them are mine” But it’s my soul they claim, my heart is the vine You will not abandon my soul
2.
Oh what a fool I was To be overconfident Our eyes were innocent Unlike the precondition of our hearts I saw the warning signs Of my legalistic mind Addicted to my pride But I couldn’t take the shame of breaking down I never realized how broken I was ‘Til I saw my hands on your heart Our words are like daggers that paint with our blood They strike us and tear us apart I promised to be your shelter But every time you needed me I thought you were blaming me And I was too busy sheltering my flaws I promised to be your armor But like a crusader I could never be your Savior I couldn’t even save you from myself But the journey to wholeness Is found in cold shattered pieces For unless we are broken Our flesh won’t be united I never felt so broken We strike us and we tear us apart Oh I never realized I was so broken But this is the journey to be whole
3.
The hungry, the poor, and the stranger Listen in to the heartfelt prayers of our lovely church We lead them on with happy words of hope Of bumper-sticker phrases and pre-packaged anecdotes But little do they know that this is just a show A show of rhetoric and arguments ‘bout words the teacher spoke We spend our time drawing these lines to verify who is right So on this road to Jericho these half-dead strangers miss our eyes O God have mercy on us O God have mercy on us We are to be a voice for the unheard But we raise our hostile voices to get the last word We are to be a guardian for the oppressed But we guard the status quo and condemn the unrest We are to be a home for the refugee But we defend our homes against the least of these While we claim your name we rob your fame While we claim your name we rob your fame We colonize the needy with religion We give them things we think they want, we’re in and out like hit-and-runs We hand out cash and wave our flags and then we pat our backs And we post our filtered photos and deduct our income tax Woe to the shepherds who scatter the sheep They drive them away from the pasture Let us be shepherds who lay down our lives That they may be saved and may multiply We have pointed our fingers at everybody but ourselves We have painted our tombstones so nobody can tell That though we’re clean on the outside We’re good as dead on the inside Though our bodies are washed by water Our souls have never felt fire
4.
Father 05:29
When my father left I asked "how could you run away" I didn't understand how he could leave us alone But now that I'm a father too I'm scared that I will run away 'Cause I feel like I'm a failure and you're better off alone God I ask for your help 'Cause I don't wanna let my baby down I promised, I promised I'd be different But I'm scared, I'm scared to hold you 'Cause my hands are red with blood I'm not the father you want to look up to I'm not the father you want to look up to There is a father I want you to know who will never run away Though we push him aside and say "please leave me alone" He's a good father who will come and find you if you run away And if you feel like you're a failure you are never alone God I ask for yourself 'Cause you will never let my baby down Let's promise, let's promise to be different 'Cause he holds me and he also wants to hold you He'll wash you clean with his blood He is the father you want to look up to He is the father you want to look up to God teach me how to listen God teach me how to speak God teach me love and patience I want to be like you God teach me how to lavish God teach me how to weep God teach me fatherhood I want to be like you God I ask for yourself 'Cause you will never let my baby down
5.
Can you open up my eyes So I can recognize my heart It’s staying up all night It’s stuck, preoccupied in this war Trying to plot and strategize Making demons out of slights, it’s all a farce ‘Cause the battle’s in my mind But it’s convinced it’s worth the fight, or I’ll fall apart I’m trying to read everyone’s minds but mine I’m trying to speak everyone’s lines but mine I’m trying to make peace with everyone With everyone Everyone but me Every day I’m spending time Finding scapegoats to indict for my scars Who is wrong and who is right? I can’t separate the light from the dark There’s friendly fire on all sides But I’m the only one alive and I’m armed I am the fugitive and I Am the assailant in this fight, and it’s tearing me apart All of my life I’ve been looking for help I’ve been surrounded by monsters I can’t find an exit, can’t get out of this cell ‘Cause the monster is myself, the monster is myself God, I need your help
6.
Somewhere along the journey From discovery to maturity I lost sight of you I blinked once or twice I think And my life unraveled without me And I finally see That I’m not where I’m supposed to be But apathy has got a hold on me I can’t deny the truth “Wake up, it’s all a dream” I want to say, I want to scream I want to lie in peace Can we go back Back to the beginning When you were my first love and I had nothing else Can we go back Back to the beginning When having you was enough ‘cause I had nothing You were enough ‘cause I had nothing else I’m not sure how it came to be That this soul became a machine That’s running on empty The fire’s gone and the wonder too It’s just laws and lists of things to do I need an awakening I need an awakening My life is a hurricane Disaster scattered in its wake And I don’t want to take the blame I just want to wake up I just want to wake up Take me back I just want to see you I just want to love you
7.
Tear Us Down 03:53
Look how high we are We made it to the heavens We can almost reach the stars We laid our brick and tar Who could’ve thought that We’d succeed, that we would come so far? We look on with pride At the tower we raised It’s all we imagined While we turn a blind eye To the souls that we paid To fund our great attainment To fund our great attainment Pierce our souls Discern our thoughts Strike fear in our hearts Tear us down Blessed are the rich Come give your gold And we will write your names on shiny bricks We’ll blow our trumpets in the streets So all may see and praise you for your kindly gifts We deconstruct the cornerstone We reconstruct the walls you tore down We’re deeply in love with earthly thrones We need your justice to roll down
8.
I Lost You 04:20
I didn’t know any better I thought that if I walked the path That you laid out before me That all would be well Oh how the days at the start Painted my heart with laughter I was filled with courage For all seemed to be well But somewhere along the way I can’t explain I lost you Somewhere along the way There’s no one else to blame I lost you Every now and again my heroes fell I was taken my shock and surprise But I resolved to go on For all would be well But the doubts in my mind were maturing Under my outer disguise And fear took a hold of my bones Would all be well? 'Cause somewhere along the way I can’t explain I lost you Somewhere along the way There’s no one else to blame I lost you I open up my eyes For the first time in a long time And I’m lost I’m surrounded by these clones Fighting over which way to go And we’re all lost We’re blind leading the blind leading the blind We’re so far away from where you told us to go Where do we go? Please save our souls Please bring us home
9.
The Fight 05:22
I have tried to right my wrongs But every time I wronged your rights Trapped inside this twisted plot Fated to fall every time Now I lie my way through the day And I lie awake through the night Wondering how everything changed And how I came to lose my life I spent myself to climb up this hill But I slip just once and tumble back down So much pain yet with nothing to gain My high and mighty pride is fallen to the ground Where is the fight in me? Where is the fight in me? Everything that used to be Familiar and clear to me Now seems like a distant dream Fading from my memories I fear this house will fall apart It’s built on rock but made of cards Stacked against me from the start But I played the hand dealt to my heart Every morning I look in the mirror Looking for a brand new man But I never see anything different It’s always the same defeated man A stone in his chest, a leash ‘round his neck No fire in his eyes, no sweat in his hands But I’ll fight my war ’til I’ve got nothing left Even though I know I won’t stand a chance ‘Cause one of these days I’ll be a new man Maybe tomorrow’s man will stand a chance Maybe tomorrow’s man will stand a chance Can you take this stone out of my chest? Can you take this leash off of my neck? Can you put the fire in my eyes? Can you put the fight in me?

about

This is my return to doing piano-and-vocals songs.

credits

released February 9, 2017

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Larry Lin Baltimore, Maryland

I was born in San Jose, CA, and I now live in Baltimore, MD. I am a follower of Jesus, a husband, a father to two children, a nerd, a politics and current events conversationalist, a writer, a peacemaker, and a wannabe vegan. Also, I love music, and I make music on the side. ... more

contact / help

Contact Larry Lin

Streaming and
Download help

Report this album or account

If you like Larry Lin, you may also like: